All of us have suffered events in our lives that are painful, sudden and many times financially, emotionally or medically devastating. These events can be legitimately unfair and not right. The problem is that when these things happen , unfortunately, they are what they are and most times we cannot undue them.
It can take years to overcome the emotional impact when bad things happen and the mental struggle and anger can erode our life and our attitudes to continue on.
I recently watched the movie "The Martian" starring Matt Damon and at the very end of the movie he gave a great piece of advice about moving on when bad things happen. He was speaking to a group of would be astronaut students. Damon asked the question if anyone was worried about being killed in space. He told them they had better be afraid and that anything and everything that could go wrong in space probably would. (sounds like life)! "What do you do when things go wrong? Do You quit or go on?" Damon Asked. Stressing that you just have to deal with the problems one at a time from the start. He said "You start with the first problem and the move to the next."
Below are six steps to help move on when bad things happen.
Six Steps When Bad Things Happen
Step 1:Acceptance: This will be the most difficult step. Accepting things that we feel are unfair or unjust is not easy and can take time, sometimes years. Coming to grips with the situation and why it happened is not easy the quicker that we do the sooner we can move on.
Step 2:Build a Plan: What happened is over and now its time to develop a plan to move forward. A strategy to start fresh.
Build a new resume if you lost your job and develop a strategy to start marketing yourself. Believe you will find something better.
If the problem is medical, get a second opinion, set up a plan of treatment and don't give up.
Whatever the situation you need a plan to move forward.
Step 3: Take Action: A plan is of no good without action. Many times if we allow bad things to take control it can cause us to lay dormant and almost paralyze us from living a full and happy life. Action can help keep our minds off the past.
Step 4: Be thankful for what you have: There is always something that could be worse....remember that. Being thankful for what you have is cleansing.
Step 5: Strive to have a great attitude: Attitude is probably the single greatest tool the human mind has in overcoming any obstacle that we might face. The stories throughout history are endless of individuals that attribute their attitude to helping them overcome.
Step 6: Believe you can do it: I understand that these steps are not easy. Moving on when bad things happen is difficult but not impossible. So many times I have shared this and individuals will say " It's easy for you to tell me to do this. It's no you going through this!" But, yes it has been me, these step I have and do use in my life and they allow me to strive for success and happiness even when bad things happen.
They work for me and they can work for you. Believe!
Generational differences foster a “ME” society in the workplace
It is obvious to most individuals that are honest with themselves that we live in a “me” society. We are for the most part, self absorbed and we want what we want when we want it, which is normally, right this moment. We cannot debate the that life expectancy being extended longer every year has resulted in more generations overlapping in the workplace. Boomers, Generation X’ers the Millennials. Leading a team with such varying beliefs, knowledge and work ethic to say the least can be challenging. Before we can explore the techniques best utilized to build a successful team environment with such generational differences we should look at each group and try to understand what motivates them.
Born: Between 1956 and 1964
Influencers: Civil Rights, Vietnam War, Sexual Revolution, The Cold War and Space Travel
“The American Dream” was promised to them as children and they have chased it. Seen as greedy, materialistic and ambitious.
Core Values: Anti War, Anti Government, Equal Rights, Optimism, Personal Growth, Work
Work Ethic: Driven, Workaholic
The Generation X’ers
Born: Between 1965-1980
Influencers: Watergate, Energy Crisis, Duel Income Families and Single Parents, Latchkey, Y2K, Increased Divorce Rate
Their perceptions are shaped by growing up having to take care of themselves early and watching politicians lie and their parents get laid off. The first generation that will NOT do as well financially as their parents did.
Core Values: Balance, Entrepreneurial, Fun, Higher Education, High Expectations, Suspicious of Boomers Values, Techno Literacy
Work Ethic: Balance, Work Smarter With Quicker Output
Born: Between 1981-2000
Influencers: Digital Media, Child Focused World, Terrorist Attacks, AIDS, 9/11, Many Grew Up Children of Divorce
Millennials came of age in a period of economic expansion. First generation of children to have schedules.
These distinct Generational Difference have caused each group to establish camps within many organizations with Millennials begrudging Boomers, Boomers complaining about X’ers and so on. This situation becomes compounded when each group feels entitled based on their personal realities of what they deserve. The work place becomes about “ME or I” rather than the team. And to steal an old cliche ” There is no “me” I in team”.
Five Ways To Build A Team In A Me Society
Develop and communicate vision for where you want to take the team and try to incorporate each generational groups core values into how you will succeed with individuals with different skill sets.
Be open about the generational differences between groups and individuals. Don’t be afraid to have open dialogue about how each individual can benefit the team because of the diversity.
Encourage interaction between the generations on your team. Use team building exercise were you pair up a Boomer and a Millennial, as an example
Be understanding that you cannot paint everyone with the same brush. It takes many different skill sets and personalities to build a great team.
Keep it personal. Let the individuals know that you understand their motivations and drivers and that they fit into the teams vision.
There are so many correlations between life and sport. A wealth of inspiration that can be gleamed from sport stories particularly Olympic Inspiration. The stories and legends that have grown up over the past years since the first modern Olympics held in 1896 are timeless and can help each of us find inspiration in or daily lives.
Comparisons to live and sport are numerous:
The list goes on we face both to a greater extent and a lesser extent many of the same experiences that an athlete face preparing for and participating in competition. I have always found great Olympic Inspiration not just in the victories but in the struggles that have engulfed me as I watched since I was a small child. The Olympic Creed says it best.
The Olympic Creed:
“The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not to win but to take part, just as the most important thing in life is not the triumph, but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered, but to have fought well.”
American is in trouble and the trouble is getting deeper and deeper. The National Debt has risen to over 20 Trillion dollars and is still climbing. The reasons are varied defense spending, cost of running the government are just two of the factors here are Four Big Killers of America:
America needs leadership in all phases of our country from our politicians to our corporations. The problem is many individuals that are in leadership positions are not equipped with the experience or the people skills to lead. None the less they are put into these roles because they went to the right college or university or they knew the right person. You or I cannot change this paradigm, it is simply the way things and will most likely always be.
So what is the answer to this leadership dilemma? I believe that the answer lies in leadership from the bottom up. Each one of us has the ability to facilitate change in our “world” by taking on a leadership role regardless of our title at the moment. Now, you don’t have to be the “boss” of anyone. Leadership is not about telling others what to do but rather it is a function of setting and displaying a culture and a standard for the organization you belong to.
What can you do to provide leadership from the bottom up?
Manage your attitude! Attitude can make or break an organization. If you want your “world” to be successful than why would you not want to spread a positive attitude?
Take initiative and don’t wait to be told what to do. Most of the time we understand what we can do to make a positive impact within our company or community. TAKE ACTION!
Reach out to others. There is always someone that can use a helping hand, be it within the company we work with or the community we live in. Don’t worry about “you’re not the boss of me” if someone asks you to do something pitch in and make a difference that’s what leadership is about.
Be proactive to help bring change to your organization that is beneficial.
“You’re not the boss of me.” I’m the boss of me and with that comes the responsibility of giving up vanity for the sake of the organization. We can all make a difference in our community or our company if we put ego to the side and heed the above four steps.
Events will unfold in this country that every American must know. To be unprepared for these coming issues could be financially devastating. Every American is aware that these issues exist but few know what to do to prevent them form causing havoc to their financial well being. There is a FINANCIAL TSUNAMI heading towards America and step must be taken by each of us to make sure we are prepared. There are five things every American must know!
Five Things Every American Must Know!
The Social Security System Trust Fund will be bankrupt by 2040!
“The Social Security Board of Trustees today released its annual report on the long-term financial status of the Social Security Trust Funds. The combined asset reserves of the Old-Age and Survivors Insurance, and Disability Insurance (OASDI) Trust Funds are projected to become depleted in 2034, the same as projected last year, with 79 percent of benefits payable at that time. The DI Trust Fund will become depleted in 2023, extended from last year’s estimate of 2016, with 89 percent of benefits still payable”
Based on the first four issues it is vital that we work to make sure that our money lives longer than we do, especially if number five is correct. My prediction is that they are spot on! Americans must face the facts and start planning for the future or they will be sadly mistaken when they reach the golden years and only to find fools gold.
What does Faith Destroys Failure mean? You only fail at anything in life if you give up having hope and faith. The one absolute I have discovered in life is that if I always have hope I eventually find what I am searching for and can defeat any challenge I face.
Yes, there will always be loss of loved ones, health issues and set backs as we take life’s journey. Many of these things we cannot understand but with faith we can endure. The grief of the loss of someone can be overcome with faith that there is a greater place then and that we will see that loved one again. When we allow our faith to be taken we are forced into the black abyss of hopelessness and despair that will eventually destroy our hearts and souls leaving us to go through life in a cloud of darkness and self pity.
My doctor, a wonderful women lost two children at very young ages to a crippling disease. I cannot begin to understand the pain she must suffer daily at that type of loss but this women brings hope and medical healing everyday to her many patients, she is always positive and focuses on others. I must believe she is driven by some form of faith.
So why would someone not choose to allow faith to guide thier lives but instead choose to allow dark despair to take over? This is a question that I truly cannot answer. Although, I myself have suffered lose of loved ones and many physical issues, the faith that helps me push on is something that is not easily explainable. I have always wanted to believe that there was a reason and a purpose for all that has happened in my life. I believe it is simply a choice I have made internally, to believe, and everyone is capable of making that same choice if they desire.
How to find faith
Have belief in yourself – it is as simple as making a decision that your life has meaning, even when you are suffering. We can all believe something good will happen! We can also belief something bad will happen! Which do you choose?
Don’t be afraid to change – one of my favorite sayings is “No Change – No Change”. If you are a negative person – CHANGE – it is as easy as deciding and having faith you can. If you hate your job find a new one. Look for that job and choose to believe you will find it.
Never give up on yourself or the universe – giving up is the easiest thing in life but persevering and choosing to believe in yourself takes courage.
Manafesting faith and hope into reality has no timetable! It can take a day , a week, a month or years. But if you want something to change and it takes five years, than those five years will go by wheather or not you choose to have faith your dreams will be a reality. Would you not rather go those five years with the joy of faith that you will get there. If you do then you cannot fail. Failure only comes from losing faith.
Tony Robbin explains in the following video Changing Your Mindset Can Change Your Life
Nineteen Trillion dollars of debt, stock market uncertainty and probable tax increases. The future for America’s 75 Million Millennials to say the least is uncertain. But problems are greater than only financial challenges, the are in the individuals.
Who Are The Millennials
“Just beginning to enter the workplace, The Millennial Generation was born between 1977 and 1998. The 75 million members of this generation are being raised at the most child-centric time in our history. Perhaps it’s because of the showers of attention and high expectations from parents that they display a great deal of self-confidence to the point of appearing cocky. As you might expect, this group is technically literate like no one else. Technology has always been part of their lives, whether it’s computers and the Internet or cell phones and text pagers.
Millennials are typically team-oriented, banding together to date and socialize rather than pairing off. They work well in groups, preferring this to individual endeavors. They’re good multitaskers, having juggled sports, school, and social interests as children so expect them to work hard. Millennials seem to expect structure in the workplace. They acknowledge and respect positions and titles, and want a relationship with their boss. This doesn’t always mesh with Generation X’s love of independence and hands-off style.
All Millennials have one thing in common: They are new to the professional workplace. Therefore, they are definitely in need of mentoring, no matter how smart and confident they are. And they’ll respond well to the personal attention. Because they appreciate structure and stability, mentoring Millennials should be more formal, with set meetings and a more authoritative attitude on the mentor’s part.
Here is a the challenge that Millennials will face:
Why is Memorial Day important to celebrate? There are many confused and misguided individuals who believe that Memorial Day is a celebration of war. Nothing could be further from the truth. The day is a celebration and a chance to remember the millions of Americans that either eagerly or reluctantly answered their countries call to duty. They served in the past and serve today to preserve a way of life that allows you and I to complain, to vote or not vote, to worship or not worship and to be safe.
Some Interesting Statistics:
1775 – 1991
41,892,128 men and women have served our country militarily.
1,186,313 have given their lives in three conflicts during this period.
Many would argue that these were lives wasted but before cast judgement think seriously about these numbers. During this same time frame:
Hitler killed 11 million innocent people
Stalin is estimated to have killed 10 – 20 million during his reign of terror.
Pol Pot destroyed 25% of Cambodia’s population. 1 to 3 million lives lost.
Saddam Hussein is credited with 250,000 to 500,000 deaths
And the North Korean Leader Kim has killed close to 1.6 million people
Who will defend the innocent, the weak the defenseless?
Why Memorial Day? It is our opportunity to thank, think of and remember those who have served and are currently t risking their lives for a cause greater than themselves, FREEDOM and right to not live under TYRANT’S like those listed above.
No Memorial Day is not about war but it is about those who are willing to endure it, if necessary, so you and I do not have to.
Thank you to all that have worn and do wear the uniform of freedom and GOD BLESS YOU!